Diary of 5

Diary of 5 – 12th June

I am seeing… “Silk” on TV, and my worktable nicely piling high with some crocheted flowers and leaves that I made today, ready for sewing together into a couple of brooches.

I am hearing… apart from the TV, nothing. It’s all quiet.

I am smelling… furniture polish from my (brief) attempt at some housework earlier today.

I tasted… a beautiful cup of tea made for me by my beautiful daughter J

I am feeling… very uncomfortable with pains in my stomach and my back. Emotionally a little fragile – there are a couple of big appointments coming up which I am dreading and they are starting to weigh heavily on me. Also, the first days of an episode always leave me feeling a little bit emotional because yet again it is proved that this whole health shebang isn’t over at all and I get the sense of “here we bloody well go again”. After two and a half years it’s wearing a little bit thin now.




7 thoughts on “Diary of 5 – 12th June”

  1. Two and a half years???? What the hey… I’m so sorry to hear that you are still suffering, Pam. Hopefully you will get through the appointments okay.
    Blessings – Maxi


    1. Thanks Maxi. The appointments are to do with my ability to work and having to prove that my health condition is stopping me from living my life. The stress of having to prove it is awful and is just a huge political hot potato for the government to show that they are shaking up the welfare state. They have got to do something to stop the deadlegs lying and cheating their way through the system but in the meantime they are hurting genuine people as well. I have always worked and always earned my living right up until I was taken ill (I was actually sat at my desk!) but that doesn’t seem to have any bearing on the situation now. I’m viewed as a skiver and money-grabber but it’s not my fault the health service is so slow at diagnosing me and getting me back on my feet. It’s so frustrating and stressful and I’m feeling it at the minute. Sorry for the rant but it does help to know there is a listening ear (or eyes!) out there so thank you for listening 🙂


      1. I’m listening, Pam. I feel sad that you have to struggle so much. You are hurting and still trying always to put on a cheerful face. Don’t give up. Relax a bit, but believe that you can get better. Don’t feel bad if you have to rest a bit more. I hope your appointments aren’t too stressful for you. I wish you good luck and some improvement with your health. Thank you for posting!


      2. Thank you so much Uta. Your support really means a lot to me and you have cheered me up with your comments. I’m reverting to one of my usual coping strategies and crocheting a lot at the moment which helps me too. Bless you 🙂


      3. You’re welcome Uta! It makes a huge difference to me to know that there are people like you out there and reading my words. Thank you for your support and kindness 🙂


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