Dopey McDope

Have you ever had one of those days where you are just Dopey McDope, from Dopeton on the edge of Dopey Moor? Well that’s been me today.

It all began last night, when I came in from my Bible study at church and I was cold. Not just “cold” cold, but chilled to the bone cold, where even my marrow felt like it had ice crystals in it. I had a shower to try and warm up but no, that didn’t work. I got into bed with an extra layer on and no, that didn’t work either. I got a hot water bottle and put that at the bottom of my bed to warm up my feet thinking that if my feet were warm then I would feel a bit better all over.

But. The thing is, I’m allergic to latex and guess what? Yup. The rubber hot water bottle is made from latex and guess what Dopey here had for most of the night? Yes. Itchy (oh boy ITCHY) legs, feet and back with a bit of wheezy breathing too. I was that cold I didn’t properly go to sleep, and because of being itchy from the hot water bottle I kept waking up from the shallow sleep I did eventually drift off into.

Which brings me to this morning. I was still freezing cold when my alarm when off at 6.45am. Why was it that early, I hear you ask. Well I was down to invigilate an exam at school this morning and was travelling in with Kevin so had to be up extra early.

Because of the cold thing last night I left ironing my trousers til this morning. And I was half-awake when I did them. (Half awake, half asleep….glass full, glass empty). I put an iron mark on them.

So I get to school and walk into a door.

Then, when I was in the exam room I slipped off the edge of a desk – in front of a room full of 16 year olds. I filled in the attendance sheet in pen instead of pencil (couldn’t see to read it properly because I was too embarrassed to get my reading glasses out of my bag), and spelled one of the kid’s names wrong.

I had to work out an hour and 15 minutes from 9.18am, and I put 10.32am end time on the board. It took me the best part of an hour to realise that I had got it wrong and then, when I went to change it to 10.33 realised I’d written in permanent marker on the whiteboard and not the erasable one.

It gets better.

After dismissing the kids after the exam, I had to help bag up the scripts in alphabetical order. I nearly wept trying to get the H’s after the C’s for some reason….Dopey McDope strikes again.

Then when I was signing out in the staff login book, I noted the time was 10.50am. That’s ten minutes before 11 o’clock. Or, as I signed out… “11.55”. Why??? I decided that I could do with some refreshment and so went to the water fountain in Reception to get some water.

I duly put my head over the fountain, pressed the button for water and…you guessed it…it squirted straight up and over my face. Right in the mush. With force. And it was COLD.

Sadly, it didn’t wake me up any and I stumbled out the front door without getting a drink because I was too embarrassed in front of the Receptionist and had water dripping down my face.

The day did get better, I have to admit. I only called Dan “Tom” once in band (usually it’s at least a dozen times), I only mixed up Sue and Lynne’s names the once (which is an improvement on Tom/Dan), I didn’t spill beans down my front at lunch, I only took one layer of skin off my elbow when I banged it on the bannister, I almost saw the Flying Scotsman on the railway that runs past school (I heard the chuff chuff of it in the distance) and I will be rectifying that tomorrow when we go to see her at Heywood station tomorrow afternoon. When I got to my studies this afternoon the weather brightened up for a little while, and to cheer myself up (and to wipe out the dopey day up to that point) I took this photo of the view outside my window.


They say that it will snow here in the next few days. I’m not sure I ought to be allowed out to be honest. I think I’ll be staying in where it’s warm and cosy. Although NOT with a hot water bottle I don’t think.





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